Lady in Black – By Boakyewaa Glover

For years, I’ve caught a lot of flack from some friends and family about wearing black. It’s my favorite color. I love it for reasons that are kinda clear to me, but not really. I wear black all the darn time! It’s sickening, I know. And even when I promise myself I will never wear black ever again, I do. I’m addicted to wearing black. I have so many addictions that I’m not sure this is the greatest crime of them all. There is the coke, a la coca cola addiction, which I think is the strongest actually. That toxic carbonated @#$% just does something to me. There is the kissing addiction, which is sort of under control since I left my comfort zone, Ghana. There are others, but not quite debilitating. So back to wearing black, second strongest addiction I have.

My black obsession is not gothic though, just to be clear. And when my website was first done, it was really dark and even I, Queen Bee of Blackness, insisted it had to be totally lightened up. Not pink, but not dark either. See, I am not OCD on black, I think. But yes, my obsession with the color is still troubling.

My friend just told me online very bluntly that she’s sick of seeing me in black. That’s what this Facebook does to you, overexposure of black. It wasn’t the first time she, or someone, had said it. But Facebook is killing me here! I went through all my Facebook albums and it’s depressing. What is this fascination with black?

I went digging in Google for some theories and I thought I’d share a few.

“Black is the color of authority and power. It is popular in fashion because it makes people appear thinner. It is also stylish and timeless. Black also implies submission. Priests wear black to signify submission to God. Some fashion experts say a woman wearing black implies submission to men. Black outfits can also be overpowering, or make the wearer seem aloof or evil.”

“Wearing grays and blacks can be depressive. Let’s face it, black and gray are fashion basics. We all have the basic black suit or black dress slacks that are a must wear for a number of different social settings. Aside from the slinky spaghetti strapped number you have hanging in the back of the closet, you likely choose to wear black because you prefer to blend in and not make any statement. Wearing black will allow you to keep a low-profile in social settings if that is your intention. Don’t wear black if you want to stand out amidst a crowd. Most folks don’t even bother to wear black at funerals anymore, it’s just too sad to wear dreary and dark colors.”

“I wear a ton of black, and I mean a ton. You never see me with a t-shirt or jacket/sweatshirt that is any other color than black. It’s my favorite color and I don’t give a sh#$ what people say or think of me because of it. They call me emo, goth, etc. but I don’t care & you shouldn’t either. F*ck everyone else. Wear what u want.”

My sentiments aren’t quite like the dramatic closet gothic person’s comments above. I know it’s frigging depressing to be in black all the time! I hadn’t thought about it too deeply before. Ah, maybe this is what hitting 30 does to you. Gosh, what’s next? Swearing to wear make up? Err, no.

My grand father used to go crazy each time I wore black. He banned me a couple of times not to wear black in his presence. I had black finger nails and toe nails back, but I only do that sporadically now.
My mother had a car accident recently, and I wore a cream colored t-shirt and black pants to the hospital. My younger brother flipped out, completely ripped my head off for wearing black pants. Geez, what did he expect, cream shirt, cream pants? Are there any other colored pants besides black?

I will love the color black for life though. Mentally, I will love it for life, but physically, I am going to switch it up a little. Its a new era – No More Black! Maybe I’ll add a little grey, hmm, still too dark? Green, purple, blue? And just y’all know, a complete wardrobe change is costly. We are in a recession yeah. But, but, I am definitely going to try, before my Facebook pictures bury me in a sea of black. Gosh, this is going to be so hard! Ah well, baby steps, baby steps!

Why do people hate the color black so much? Why are all of you bitching about me wearing black?